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This person is me.

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posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:05 PM
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Ok so: I don't ask anyone to read this and I don't ask anyone to understand.
This post is for ME.
I found out today I'm free.
Free from the scars I have inside and out.
Free from the scars that make me wonder? Should I be proud of the scars on my back where he beat me? My wrist where he burnt me with his cigarettes? Free from the scars that bruised me so bad inside I was told I would never have a baby?
Free from the scars - my PTSD?
I asked myself - should I be proud of me because I made it through with God's help?
Free from being told over and over my 'real' father never loved me and wanted to give up his parental rights?
Trauma where in a foster home I was emotionally beaten into submission - 'NO! Your name is not what you tell me it is'...'You were adopted'!
Free from having a child molesting rapist 'stepfather' telling me, 'See what a shat he was - your father - 'He gave you UP - to ME!'
No and no and no and no again.
ALL LIES.
I proclaim! At 53...
I. Am. ME.
I am a proud Jewess from the tribe of Benjamin, and NO ONE can ever take that from me, EVER.
And I am FREE.
I'll probably delete this soon. But in the mean time?
I stood, for one moment, and had a chance, to tell the world -
He does not own me.
He never owned me.
I am me.
And I am FREE!
edit on 1.13.2018 by Kandinsky because: fixed video embed




posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:08 PM
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It takes courage to speak up and strength to stand up.

All the best Silo



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:08 PM
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I love you Silo.



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:12 PM
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a reply to: silo13

Congratulations for the courage to say the words. Somewhere in your soul it is making an impact.



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:13 PM
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a reply to: silo13

You've made it this far and you seem to have a good head on your strong shoulders. Your dad obviously did not deserve children but unfortunately that is not how it works.

Best wishes to you and yours. If you ever want someone to vent with or talk to shoot me a pm. ✌



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:13 PM
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It doesn't matter how long it took.

What matters is you did it.

👍🏻



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:17 PM
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Happy to hear. You are free, and you are strong. Wishing the best now and in the future.

Ps. Video is not working.



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:27 PM
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a reply to: silo13

Silo,
Im happy to read that you are healing.
That's what your post is. It's you beginning to heal.
Never stop healing and you will always be free.



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:38 PM
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a reply to: silo13

Forgiveness is reaching the point where you no longer want to get even any more.

It doesn't negate that there was hurt. Or mean that you'd step back into the fire.

It is when you go beyond the manipulative reach of the past.

Although it is a process,

But you are free.


edit on 12/1/2018 by chr0naut because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:45 PM
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We really never know the person were talking to ...... I am amazed at who you are. More and more makes sense to me now. And I am sure I will think differently.



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 10:51 PM
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originally posted by: silo13
And I am FREE!

Congratulations Silo!

SO happy for you...


You're Gonna Be OK
Brian Johnson & Jenn Johnson

[Verse 1]
I know it's all you've got to just, be strong
And it's a fight just to keep it together, together
I know you think, that you are too far gone
But hope is never lost
Hope is never lost

[Pre-Chorus]
Hold on, don't let go
Hold on, don't let go

[Chorus]
Just take, one step, closer
Put one foot in front of the other
You'll, get through this
Just follow the light in the darkness
You're gonna be ok

[Verse 2]
I know your heart is heavy from those nights
Just remember that you're a fighter, a fighter
You never know just what tomorrow holds
And you're stronger than you know
Stronger than you know

[Pre-Chorus]
Hold on, don't let go
Hold on, don't let go


[Chorus]
Just take, one step, closer
Put one foot in front of the other
You'll, get through this
Just follow the light in the darkness
One step, closer
Put one foot in front of the other
You'll, get through this
Just follow the light in the darkness
You're gonna be ok

[Outro]
And when the night, is closing in
Don't give up and don't give in
This won't last, it's not the end, it's not the end
You're gonna be ok
When the night, is closing in
Don't give up and don't give in
This won't last, it's not the end, it's not the end
You're gonna be ok



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 11:06 PM
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It takes alot of strength to share about the pain of our past, thanks your a beautiful soul.




posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 11:10 PM
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a reply to: silo13

Im so proud of you, and I love you too! We share blood. Hope is never lost. We Stand tall !


edit on 12-1-2018 by visitedbythem because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 11:14 PM
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a reply to: silo13

May the Force guide you on your recovery.



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 11:17 PM
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a reply to: silo13


Omg, I am so conflicted.

My heart hurts from your pain but it also rejoices at your rebirth.

You were one of my very first friends here, and I never would have guessed this.
I just want to give you a hug.

A safe platonic bear hug filled with good vibes and positive energy.

/Huuuuuuuuuuuugs

Sincerely,
~Joe



posted on Jan, 12 2018 @ 11:34 PM
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You aren't free yet Silo, the video doesn't load.


I'm glad your around and all right Silo. I hope you never have problems like that again.



posted on Jan, 13 2018 @ 02:42 AM
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Wow ! Powerful post !! .... I hate hearing that these awful things have happened to you , it breaks my heart . No child, woman, or person , should have to endure that suffering ......although violence isn't always the answer, this makes me want to crush that guy for what he did to you ....From the bottom of my heart , I hope you continue healing and enjoying your freedom quest. It is long overdue.



posted on Jan, 13 2018 @ 02:48 AM
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I didn't know you can delete threads.
edit on 13-1-2018 by boozo because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 13 2018 @ 03:27 AM
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All I can say is well done for letting the inception go and being free. What you are is much much more, you are what you always was and not what others have projected on to yeah. abrazos.a reply to: silo13



posted on Jan, 13 2018 @ 03:33 AM
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a reply to: silo13

I do not know you, but I deeply feel what you've written about here. All my love to you. Better to proclaim this now than never. 53 is the perfect time for it. You are resilient and worthy of all the good and love you receive in your life. Never forget that. 💚💚




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